Romeo Whiskey Tango, A Roundtable
Romeo Whiskey Tango, continued.
Here we are, folks, observing the rich white trash roundtable, a gathering of the USA’s key decision makers.
Oh: you should know that they are all true alpha males. Every one of them stated this fact the moment they walked in the room.
The roundtable itself? It’s like most round tables. Spherical. Not square. Constructed using really good wood. While the table looks like it could belong in a bad-ass, King Arthur kind of tale, banish that bad-assery from your mind. This is not a blog post about bad-assery. Systemic privilege is its subject.
Seated around this not-very-bad-ass roundtable, there they are: the rich white trash who should not be empowered to make important decisions, but hey…this is America in 2025 and we seem to be rolling with our broken status quo, planet be damned.
Everyone at the table is male, most were born in the United States. Their skin colors run the range from vanilla-white to sodacracker-white.
Let’s listen in on their chit-chat:
The first RWT sheds a false tear as he informs the other RWT ‘round the roundtable that there are very few Black fathers in the homes. As a father of three from his first marriage, two from his second, and three from his third, this fact saddens him so.
He made his fortune by investing in the private prison industry.
The RWT seated next to him also sheds a little tear as he nods wholeheartedly, then expands on Private Prison RWT’s thought. “I too am a father. It’s like those people just want to go to jail so they can lay around all day while I work hard — or their goal is to be beaten by cops so they can get big payouts, like winning the lottery.”
This RWT’s riches came from what have been jokingly dubbed police brutality bonds. These are high-interest loans. Investment banks issue them to municipalities that get sued by victims of police violence. Citizens of the cities or towns repay the loans over time, plus extra, of course. A lot extra.
Police Brutality Bond RWT’s declaration receives a gigantic round of cheers from the other RWT seated ‘round the RWT roundtable.
“And is it just me…or do every one of the poors seem stupider nowadays — like they want to pollute the workforce with their incompetence?”
This comment by the RWT seated directly across the roundtable from Private-Prison RWT generates a hearty response of deep-bellied guffaws. His wealth comes from for-profit colleges.
Being the crafty RWT that he is, he divested from the for-profit college industry before the US Government cracked down. And he will take this memory of victimization by Deep State tyranny to his grave. These days, he invests in social causes like charter schools, targeting public school lunch programs, and rebuilding Confederate Civil War monuments that got torn down by wokeness.
The RWT in the chair beside him, who stashes his Credit Reporting Industry earnings in the Cayman Islands, agrees with For-Profit College RWT. “Not only are they stupid, they can’t manage money!”
Lots of back-slapping and “yessirees” at this insight.
The newest RWT at the table, Generative AI RWT, looks up from playing the Einsatzgruppen-themed wargame on his phone and blurts out, “It’s a shame we still need workers! I hate each and every last one of them…”
The collective energy hurtling ‘round the roundtable intensifies.
Eventually, the merriment fizzles. The last of the genocide jokes reaches its punchline. At this point, the RWT who was born into generational tobacco plantation wealth which has been diversified across dozens of industries raises his wine glass. “Everyone, we should honor the hardest-working men in America: our Chief Executive Officers who find every possible penny for the shareholders.”
“Here, here.” Pushing his chair back to stand up and take control of the conversation, the RWT hedge funder who just bet the farm that the USA is going to experience an economic crash greater than the Great Depression lifts up his glass. “Everyone, the CEOs’ Toast. ‘May your parachutes be as golden as your showers.’”*
“’MAY YOUR PARACHUTES BE AS GOLDEN AS YOUR SHOWERS.’”
The lightheartedness sputters. A seriousness envelops the table. RWT bring up the main reason for this roundtable discussion, why it was called in the first place.
They get down to business and talk about a collective, long-term investment strategy that protects their wealth. They start to talk about dollars and BRICS.
Russia is in deep shit. China is in deep shit. So they are pulling the USA down, too.
And the USA’s rich white trash see the plot not as a threat, but a new business opportunity. Something to focus on after Donald Trump gives them another round of tax cuts.
Also posted on my site. More about RWT: here, here, here. Earlier posts:
• Predatory capitalists need martyrs, too.
• Are you in your twenties and wondering what’s up with your parents?
• A gigantic thank you, from me to Rush Limbaugh.
• A hypothetical experiment using two bros who overuse the word “successful.”
• World events since I released my first book.
• Open letter to a selfie of my drunk-ass self, taken on August 11th, 2001.
I write fiction and have two dark comedies available, Fearkiller (Volume 1) and Notes from Trillionaire Island: Fearkiller (Volume 2), as well as Revolutionizer Alpha, the first book in a sci-fi series. I also wrote a story about God. It was weird, but then I decided to make the story and its sequel free. And all of the sudden, it didn’t seem as weird. Writing about God is much less weird when you write about God without charging money for it. Here’s my professional site, my trade.
* That CEO’s Toast is from my upcoming book, Fearkiller (Volume 3). Since 3 has a good while before it’s ready for primetime, check out my available books at Amazon.
